I always kind of hoped that I'd use this blog to write the rough draft of a memoir of my career coaching cheer. That was pretty ambitious and frankly, pretty pretentious.
There have always been a few problems with that idea anyway. I'm always too busy and too undisciplined to actually work on it. I have this compulsion to have people able to see what I write (even though they may not care and it may not be very good) which conflicts with the compulsion I have to avoid criticism and conflict.
And... blogs really shouldn't be used as diaries; personal, emotional, and raw. Since Blogs are automatically on the Web and therefore available to the whole world- its not a great idea to write what you really feel, while you're feeling it while still professionally engaged with who/what you're feeling it about.
For these reasons, in case you hadn't noticed, I've pretty well left this blog fallow for a while now.
At any rate, while I may or may not abandon this blog entirely (this conglomeration of blogs really), I've been wanting to streamline &/or consolidate all of them for a while now, so I've started something new: http://tedmallory.wordpress.com
Please follow the link and take a look. I'm hoping to revitalize my blogging by making doing it more consistently and having each post be more brief and focused. I hope you'll like it and follow me at the new single blog site. Thanks. See you there.
Tuesday, May 20, 2014
Saturday, August 13, 2011
Here comes the new season
I'm really tempted to just fold this blog into my main blog, http://tedscolumn.blogspot.com.
I feel like when I really use it, it's more to just vent than to document- let alone build anything book worthy. When I use it to vent, I'm being too reactionary. It seems like rather than relieve my stress, I feel like it only makes me more wound up. It misrepresents how negative coaching cheer can be when actually it's always been an overall very meaningful and rewarding experience for me. And of course, there's always the risk that students or parents that I write about might be offended.
Like at the beginning of the summer when the mother of a Freshman candidate was so livid with me for not putting her on the squad. It was unfair that her grandfather's funeral was the day that tryouts had been scheduled, but she hadn't turned in a permission form or teacher-recommendation forms which had been due a week before and had been available for almost two months before.
The real issue was that she was academically ineligible. I double-checked the policy and touched base with both our guidance counselor and our principal to make sure I was as clear as I could be with the parent. To be honest, the child can be a divisive, volatile, and disrespectful tiger. She's let her anger get away from her and used obscenity in uniform before while on junior high cheer- but even if she was perfect, her grades would've kept her off.
But that's the kind of conflict that both makes me wonder how many more years I want to continue coaching cheer and makes me question the wisdom of trying to blog about it (even when I try to protect the identities of the kids I work with.
Facebook and Twitter are shorter, easier and more immediate, making blogging something that I'm not as disciplined at as I used to be. Life gets pretty busy too. All summer I thought I'd write but instead was caught up in church and family activities. And school is about to start, which will make things incredibly busy again.
It seems like we've never had the first football game for a week or so after school had gotten started. This year our first home game is next Friday, school starts Wednesday! Three of my four cheerleaders are scared to have to perform at the first pep rally. I can't blame them.
The pep band won't be playing at the game that night. Our principal actually left it up to me whether or not to even have a pep rally. I really think we should, but I don't know if I should push the girls too hard if they're not ready.
One, a Junior, was even ready to quit earlier this week.
"i really didnt wanna do it in the first place but (Senior) was pressuring me so i thought i would give it a try but now im having second thougts because im really not the cheerleading type i like cheering from the stands...and i hate being in front of crowds like at pep rallys i cant do that...im sorry," she told me.
I feel like when I really use it, it's more to just vent than to document- let alone build anything book worthy. When I use it to vent, I'm being too reactionary. It seems like rather than relieve my stress, I feel like it only makes me more wound up. It misrepresents how negative coaching cheer can be when actually it's always been an overall very meaningful and rewarding experience for me. And of course, there's always the risk that students or parents that I write about might be offended.
Like at the beginning of the summer when the mother of a Freshman candidate was so livid with me for not putting her on the squad. It was unfair that her grandfather's funeral was the day that tryouts had been scheduled, but she hadn't turned in a permission form or teacher-recommendation forms which had been due a week before and had been available for almost two months before.
The real issue was that she was academically ineligible. I double-checked the policy and touched base with both our guidance counselor and our principal to make sure I was as clear as I could be with the parent. To be honest, the child can be a divisive, volatile, and disrespectful tiger. She's let her anger get away from her and used obscenity in uniform before while on junior high cheer- but even if she was perfect, her grades would've kept her off.
But that's the kind of conflict that both makes me wonder how many more years I want to continue coaching cheer and makes me question the wisdom of trying to blog about it (even when I try to protect the identities of the kids I work with.
Facebook and Twitter are shorter, easier and more immediate, making blogging something that I'm not as disciplined at as I used to be. Life gets pretty busy too. All summer I thought I'd write but instead was caught up in church and family activities. And school is about to start, which will make things incredibly busy again.
It seems like we've never had the first football game for a week or so after school had gotten started. This year our first home game is next Friday, school starts Wednesday! Three of my four cheerleaders are scared to have to perform at the first pep rally. I can't blame them.
The pep band won't be playing at the game that night. Our principal actually left it up to me whether or not to even have a pep rally. I really think we should, but I don't know if I should push the girls too hard if they're not ready.
One, a Junior, was even ready to quit earlier this week.
"i really didnt wanna do it in the first place but (Senior) was pressuring me so i thought i would give it a try but now im having second thougts because im really not the cheerleading type i like cheering from the stands...and i hate being in front of crowds like at pep rallys i cant do that...im sorry," she told me.
I was having a heart attack.
I did my best to convince the Junior, "You're telling me that (Freshman Z), (Senior B), and (Sophomore R) ARE "cheerleader types" and you're not? (each example was a former cheerleader who was shy, awkward, or socially isolated). They're willing to get in front of people, but you're afraid to? Kiddo, you're smart, you're responsible, and you're gorgeous. Pep Rallies are nothing to be afraid of- let (Senior) carry them and just go along with the ride, they're fast and most kids who've cheered (like B, Z, and R) wind up actually thinking they're fun.
You're a natural leader and really fun. If you can handle Drill, Cheer will be a piece of cake.
I still think you should at least try a game or two. But, I understand how it can feel to be pressured so just like I said before, ultimately it's up to you- but I can tell you, if you can conquer this challenge (and I totally believe you can) you will come away with confidence and poise like you wouldn't believe. Doing this can put you over the top- it can be the difference between being kind of a leader and a majorly powerful woman who'll take on the world. If you bite down hard and try this this one short season, it'll be all gain for you.
Think on it, pray on it. Talk to someone you trust, adult or friend about it and let me know next week. I'll totally back off and not tease you or try to make you feel guilty (like how I tried to pressure Katie last year). But I really think you'll be great at this and this could be great for you."
I still think you should at least try a game or two. But, I understand how it can feel to be pressured so just like I said before, ultimately it's up to you- but I can tell you, if you can conquer this challenge (and I totally believe you can) you will come away with confidence and poise like you wouldn't believe. Doing this can put you over the top- it can be the difference between being kind of a leader and a majorly powerful woman who'll take on the world. If you bite down hard and try this this one short season, it'll be all gain for you.
Think on it, pray on it. Talk to someone you trust, adult or friend about it and let me know next week. I'll totally back off and not tease you or try to make you feel guilty (like how I tried to pressure Katie last year). But I really think you'll be great at this and this could be great for you."
Poise and Confidence are a couple of blocks on John Wooden's Pyramid of Success. I truly believe that these are powerful gifts that cheerleading can bestow on kids and I meant every word I said to her. But let's face it, I didn't want to go from 4 to only 3 (especially since one of the 3 is still pretty iffy). And I'll be honest, I'm not keen on the prospect of having Senior B or the "tiger" Freshman on squad this season either, if only because neither works well with the Senior we do have.
Fortunately, she tentatively agreed to give it a try. One of our Freshmen is really just giving it a try too ("iffy"), her true love is volleyball and her mother is nervous about her being too involved in too many things.
If you're actually a regular reader, or one of my friends or former cheerleaders that I shared this blog with, I'd sure appreciate your prayers and positive thoughts. Like every year. (:
This is the most I've written here in months and I really SHOULD be preparing lessons for next week. So anyway, if you come looking for this blog and don't find it, head on over to http://tedscolumn.blogspot.com and just run a search for "cheer," or "coaching," or "Pappa Bear" and you should still be able to find this kind of entry once in a while.
Friday, May 13, 2011
Perennial Stress-Out
Started out with 11 candidate, now 4 are backing out...
and I moved tryouts from today till next week due to Track meets, but guess what? Softball practice & games all nxt week AND we had girls qualify for State Track Meet- which is the day of my tryout!!!
Here's a note that I sent to our faculty and to some veteran cheerleaders, begging for them to put pressure on kids-
and I moved tryouts from today till next week due to Track meets, but guess what? Softball practice & games all nxt week AND we had girls qualify for State Track Meet- which is the day of my tryout!!!
Here's a note that I sent to our faculty and to some veteran cheerleaders, begging for them to put pressure on kids-
Teachers/Staff- I really need your help!
Last week I had 11 candidates planning on trying out for cheer. I was excited, finally a real tryout, the chance to pick the best 6 out of 11- just what our cheer program needs. Kids who will get enjoy each other and that the fans will respond to.
Just yesterday, three of these candidates told me that they're opting out, citing grades, other sports and needing jobs. I reminded them that because so many of them have experience in either junior high or dance/gymnastics that if they make Cheer, it will really be a minimum time commitment. They can Cheer even if they play VB or are on Drill. They're likely to spend Friday night at the game anyway, so surely cheering won't put a strain on their grades.
Please encourage any of them that you think would make outstanding cheerleaders. Tell them how great a job you think they'd do. Tell them how much BV needs them to set a positive example and raise school spirit.
After coaching cheer for 18 years now, I firmly believe that Cheerleading provides kids with confidence, poise, and leadership.
It also promotes school spirit, pride, enthusiasm, identity, community and sportsmanship for the whole school.
So, say something to some of these girls today about how exciting it would be for BV if they were a part of that. If you don't see them today, do it this weekend or early next week.
I don't know about you, but I'm tired of seasons when we only get 5 girls come out and then having one or two quit, one or two move away and one or two end up ineligible due to grades. I can't do this alone. We're all in this together. Please do what you can.
Thank you all for your support!
Will be FreshmenAlly Kahl- Mom's not sureMarissa Bruck- Hasn't turned in paperwork yetJamie Platner- Concerned about behavior as 8th graderJennifer Zehner-
Will be SophomoresKatie Cogdill- Not sureKelsi Segebart- Deciding not toTaylor Rassell-
Will be JuniorsEmmie Wood-
Lexi Seuntjens- Deciding not to
Will Be SeniorsKayla Sternberg- Vacillating Cammey Hast- Worried about having to put up with too many Freshmen!
Wednesday, May 4, 2011
Are things looking up?
Three lively, fun girls; two Freshman and a Sophomore just came by my room to pick up forms.
Candidly, along with the Junior Cammey and 8th Grader Ally (who was JrHi Mascot this year) this would make a pretty decent crew. I will keep the posters up and running the announcements because there were at least 4 or 5 other kids whom I knew were interested at one time. I sent an email out to cheer alumna to volunteer to help judge.
The ugly part of having to have actual tryouts would be having to cut kids that I care about, to whom cheer is important. On the other hand, having higher energy, more initiative, more pride, more volume, and maybe even more dance/gymnastic skills are all great reasons to maintain a weeding-out process.
Prepare for the worst, hope for the best, let the Lord take care of the rest.
Candidly, along with the Junior Cammey and 8th Grader Ally (who was JrHi Mascot this year) this would make a pretty decent crew. I will keep the posters up and running the announcements because there were at least 4 or 5 other kids whom I knew were interested at one time. I sent an email out to cheer alumna to volunteer to help judge.
The ugly part of having to have actual tryouts would be having to cut kids that I care about, to whom cheer is important. On the other hand, having higher energy, more initiative, more pride, more volume, and maybe even more dance/gymnastic skills are all great reasons to maintain a weeding-out process.
Prepare for the worst, hope for the best, let the Lord take care of the rest.
Friday, April 29, 2011
Man on a mission
-To Murph and the Magic Tones at the Armada Room of the Holiday Inn-
Elwood: We're putting the band back together.
Jake: You were the backbone. The nerve centre of a great rhythm and blues band. You can, make that live, breath and jump again.
Jake: You were the backbone. The nerve centre of a great rhythm and blues band. You can, make that live, breath and jump again.
-To Mr. Fabulous, the Matre'd in the dining room of the Chez Paul restaraunt-
Jake: We're putting the band back together. We need ya man, we need your horn.
Mr Fabulous: I can't, I really can't.
Elwood: We got everybody but Matt guitar Murphy and Blue Lou and we're getting them next.
Mr Fabulous: No way.
Jake: If you say no, Elwood and I will come here for breakfast, lunch and dinner every day of the week.
Mr Fabulous: Okay, okay, I'll play. You got me.
Mr Fabulous: I can't, I really can't.
Elwood: We got everybody but Matt guitar Murphy and Blue Lou and we're getting them next.
Mr Fabulous: No way.
Jake: If you say no, Elwood and I will come here for breakfast, lunch and dinner every day of the week.
Mr Fabulous: Okay, okay, I'll play. You got me.
I told them straight-out; Every year it seems like people don't go out for cheerleading because they're afraid that someone else, who's too into drama or kinda snooty or way too quiet is going to go out for cheer and they wouldn't want to have to be on squad with that person. As I've been trying to convince you all for the last month or two- if only 4 or 5 girls come out that's who we have to go with, even if they're ineffective, divisive or defective, but if 10, 12, 14, 16 or more come out- then we can pick the most enthusiastic, the most amiable, and the most talented.
I've begged, I've pleaded, I've sent them pictures of when they were on cheer in junior high. I've encouraged them to encourage one another. I guess all I can do now is to hang up the sign-up sheet and run the announcements and hope for the best.
Meanwhile, we lose money. Cheer & Drill share track concessions. Most years we have 5 home meets and make a bundle of money. This year we only had 3. One got cancelled due to rain. Cheer & Drill Squad members who are on Track were all scheduled to work the last meet, Monday May 9 because it's a Boy's Meet. But now, one of their rained-out meets is being rescheduled for that Monday- AND, some of the Drill parents want to grill burgers and brats at the meet for a fundraiser. A girl just told me that no one on Drill can work concessions for that meet because their parents want them to sell burgers and brats. First of all, don't they get that they're taking money away from their own fundraiser by competing with the concessions stand for customers? And secondly, most of the cheerleaders were also on Drill or are also on Track. Especially since I had 3 cheerleaders transfer to different schools this year and 2 more quit- I will have only one or two people able to work. AAAAAUUUUUGHHH!!!
Typical teenagers
I covered a study hall last hour for another teacher. Two of my football cheerleaders, who'll both be Seniors next year were in there. We talked about potential recruits. I don't know if there was anyone that they didn't roll their eyes about, glare at me over, or just generally poo-poo. "Ugh!," "Them?!", and "If they come out, I'll QUIT." were a frequent chorus.
It does seem that the girls who are enthusiastic about coming out are either divisive and drama-prone, or woefully unskilled and ineffective. Whereas those who you'd think would be bright, fun, amiable, and have any modicum of leadership are either already committed to Volleyball, Drill, or taking stats for the football team- or they're really hesitating about taking the plunge.
At my annual coaching (performance) review, my principal made it clear that we needed to get girls who 1. aren't as on the social-fringe as they have been, 2. will make a deliberate and concerted effort to encourage/lead fans, and 3. be responsible enough to show come to games consistently. Tell me something I don't know, Boss- easier said than done. It's not easy to recruit kids who get along and will do a great job at a small AA school like ours.
It does seem that the girls who are enthusiastic about coming out are either divisive and drama-prone, or woefully unskilled and ineffective. Whereas those who you'd think would be bright, fun, amiable, and have any modicum of leadership are either already committed to Volleyball, Drill, or taking stats for the football team- or they're really hesitating about taking the plunge.
At my annual coaching (performance) review, my principal made it clear that we needed to get girls who 1. aren't as on the social-fringe as they have been, 2. will make a deliberate and concerted effort to encourage/lead fans, and 3. be responsible enough to show come to games consistently. Tell me something I don't know, Boss- easier said than done. It's not easy to recruit kids who get along and will do a great job at a small AA school like ours.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Soldier on
Two Junior girls assured me today that the two of them and at least one more were committed to cheering for football season. Hope springs eternal.
The campus daycare Director, who runs concessions during football and basketball seasons stopped by my classroom to discuss what she had left over and what her recommendations were for track. Earlier this week our drill coach tendered her resignation, so it looks as if I may have to run all 5 track meets alone. So be it. Lord, let those girls show up to work. It's always a bear. Many of them participate in track. Some of them were in both drill and cheer, some quit cheer. Now those on just drill are sheep without a shepherd. Anarchy.
But at least that's a month away.
Tonight's game was fantastic. It was a real barn-burner. We dominated the first quarter and held on to a 10 point lead through most of the second. Our the stands were overflowing, even though the game as almost 2 hours away.
Our student section stood the entire game and were a dream of a crowd for our two meek cheerleaders- who did a fantastic job most of the time and didn't let it ruffle their feathers at all when students initiated cheers on their own because the girls weren't. I was proud of them and they had a lot of fun.
One Senior girl, a dominant basketball player herself and younger sister of one of the best cheerleaders I've coached led a couple of cheers- including one where she pantomimes a roller coaster ride and the whole student section went on the ride with her. It was fantastic. I promised myself that if we won, I'd have her do it again tomorrow at a pep rally. Since we only had 2 girls left on squad, I thought about inviting everyone down who knew or thought they knew the fight-song dance to perform it at the rally.
These two quiet, shy cheerleaders are the the most loyal and dedicated. For all they lack, I think they'll be assets if they both want to return for football season next year too. With the other 3, that's 5. I know of at least two eighth graders who want to cheer as Freshmen. That's 7, the Spec. Ed. boy will make 8. 8 is enough, I'd love to get the zealous Freshman back, if she ever gets her grades up. That's 9. Then there's the Schizophrenic 8th grader and the pathological drama-queen Junior. That's 10.
If I could just get another 2-4 more to come out, I could actually have tryouts and keep the best 6 or 8. I guess I'll run the announcements and hand notices and hope for the best.
I was so caught up that it didn't matter to me that if we won, we'd play another game on Saturday- preventing me from going on a date with my wife for my birthday.
In the end, we lost 49-46. A storybook half court shot looked like it would make it in with only a second or two on the clock, but sometimes those miracles don't happen in real life the way they do in movies. Everyone was heartbroken. I was really rooting for a couple of our Senior guys who are great Art students. I knew that it had to be devastating for them.
It was a long, quiet bus ride back to school. We got in around 10 and I decided to write this while I let my van warm up. If I leave now, I can get home by or before 11. God willing I can get to sleep by Midnight. It's hard to wind down after such an adrenaline-pumping game, but 5:30AM comes mighty fast.
Thank God, as they say, that tomorrow's Friday.
The campus daycare Director, who runs concessions during football and basketball seasons stopped by my classroom to discuss what she had left over and what her recommendations were for track. Earlier this week our drill coach tendered her resignation, so it looks as if I may have to run all 5 track meets alone. So be it. Lord, let those girls show up to work. It's always a bear. Many of them participate in track. Some of them were in both drill and cheer, some quit cheer. Now those on just drill are sheep without a shepherd. Anarchy.
But at least that's a month away.
Tonight's game was fantastic. It was a real barn-burner. We dominated the first quarter and held on to a 10 point lead through most of the second. Our the stands were overflowing, even though the game as almost 2 hours away.
Our student section stood the entire game and were a dream of a crowd for our two meek cheerleaders- who did a fantastic job most of the time and didn't let it ruffle their feathers at all when students initiated cheers on their own because the girls weren't. I was proud of them and they had a lot of fun.
One Senior girl, a dominant basketball player herself and younger sister of one of the best cheerleaders I've coached led a couple of cheers- including one where she pantomimes a roller coaster ride and the whole student section went on the ride with her. It was fantastic. I promised myself that if we won, I'd have her do it again tomorrow at a pep rally. Since we only had 2 girls left on squad, I thought about inviting everyone down who knew or thought they knew the fight-song dance to perform it at the rally.
These two quiet, shy cheerleaders are the the most loyal and dedicated. For all they lack, I think they'll be assets if they both want to return for football season next year too. With the other 3, that's 5. I know of at least two eighth graders who want to cheer as Freshmen. That's 7, the Spec. Ed. boy will make 8. 8 is enough, I'd love to get the zealous Freshman back, if she ever gets her grades up. That's 9. Then there's the Schizophrenic 8th grader and the pathological drama-queen Junior. That's 10.
If I could just get another 2-4 more to come out, I could actually have tryouts and keep the best 6 or 8. I guess I'll run the announcements and hand notices and hope for the best.
I was so caught up that it didn't matter to me that if we won, we'd play another game on Saturday- preventing me from going on a date with my wife for my birthday.
In the end, we lost 49-46. A storybook half court shot looked like it would make it in with only a second or two on the clock, but sometimes those miracles don't happen in real life the way they do in movies. Everyone was heartbroken. I was really rooting for a couple of our Senior guys who are great Art students. I knew that it had to be devastating for them.
It was a long, quiet bus ride back to school. We got in around 10 and I decided to write this while I let my van warm up. If I leave now, I can get home by or before 11. God willing I can get to sleep by Midnight. It's hard to wind down after such an adrenaline-pumping game, but 5:30AM comes mighty fast.
Thank God, as they say, that tomorrow's Friday.
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